1. Don't underestimate the enemy. Sure, they might look like giant meatballs with fangs, but that doesn't mean they can't figure out how a doorknob works.
2. If Star Trek has taught us anything it's that all aliens are all either A) Warmongering sycophants or B) Utopic sex maidens. Try to determine which you are dealing with as soon as possible. There may be no need for those sentry guns after all.
3. Have you been mean to people all trip? Does everybody hate you? Sorry guy, I can't help. In fact, the most gruesome death is probably reserved for you. Maybe they eat away your skin as you writhe on the floor begging for death. Or maybe they let an inexperienced baby alien eviscerate you with its soft undeveloped claws. I don't know. But I do know you probably should have given the kid that candy bar in the opening scene.
4. A little off topic, but what if alien poop looked like twinkies? And in one scene some guy unknowingly eats alien poop and inside the "twinkie" is a wedding ring and then the guy realizes he has just eaten the digested remains of his best friend. Oh man. Classic.
5. Don't go wandering around metal corridors filled with pipes venting intermittent bursts of steam. This is where most Aliens hang out playing hacky sack and such, waiting for people to come along.
1 comment:
I was having fun reading, enjoying a quiet smile, until the hacky sack portion. Aliens playing hacky sack was just too much, and I started laughing. For a solid minute, I just finished. Wait, there's still a slight giggle. Great post.
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